By November 5, 2017November 9th, 2017No Comments

So this year I joined high school band as a freshman. It’s been all fun and good, and it’s really the best part of school. I’m a part of a small section, so it’s only a senior and me. The senior is super nice, and I actually “adopted” him as my older brother. Over the past week, we’ve been hanging out a lot and being a lot more physical than usual. We sit in the corner of the band room together, usually my legs resting on his or me in his lap. It’s been cold where I am so he has been holding my hands to warm them up. Some of the other band members have questioned our relationship and have asked if we’re dating. We really enjoy each other’s company, and I sorta miss him when I’m in class. I feel a little different (in a good way) when I’m with him, but I’m not sure, especially since I’m just getting over a guy I asked out and was rejected by about three weeks ago. I feel like there could be something between us. Thoughts?


  • It seems like you may have feelings for this person, but in the end, only you can decide how you feel.
  • Take care of yourself. It appears that you may be emotionally fragile since you recently asked someone out. This can put you in a vulnerable state. Make sure you take care of yourself fully.  Get a goods nights rest, keep school a priority, and keep your current friends in your life.
  • You are solely responsible for your own emotional state. Make sure you respect yourself, and surround yourself with people who respect you too. That includes your friends and potential love interests.  Consider how your experience in band might change if you do decide to take the relationship into the next step and date this person.  If, for some reason, it does not work out, it will be important to stay friends so that you can continue to engage in band without too much stress.
  • It is good that you love band. Since you are just starting high school, keep your mind (and options) open! Be aware of your actions and the impressions you are putting out, since you are a newcomer in the group. That being said, keep following your passion!


  • What is the best and worst case scenario that this relationship could turn to?
  • What are the most important things for you to focus on right now?
  • How long are you willing to wait to see if feelings develop?
  • Who else can you talk to about these feelings?