Crush

Crush

I knew this boy; let’s call him Tom. Tom and I were best friends and we were really close. He was really sweet. If I was ever sad, he would do anything to the best of his ability to make me happy. We always had jokes with each other. We sat next to each other in math. Math class was actually fun. But the problem was that math class was almost at the end of the day, (seventh period) and that was the only time we ever got to talk to each other.
Soon, I got Snapchat and we would talk constantly. We would also face time constantly. It always felt so good talking to him. I could be crying but after talking to him I would be laughing. One day I got an app called Tellonym. If you don’t know what Tellonym is, it is an app where you can send anonymous messages and Tom started writing really nice things.
Finally, he asked me out on Snapchat. I wanted to say yes, but in my religion you are not allowed to date; only at 18. For some reason, at school, everyone knew. So many people made fun of me and said he did it on a dare. And now he just ignores me. He didn’t care about me at all and that’s what hurts the most.

CONSIDER THIS:

  • Being treated badly by a boy can make you feel sad and alone. You are brave for facing the facts, even though your feelings are hurt.
  • If you need someone to talk to, you can head to the Teen Central website and click the Help tab to call a hotline or textline. Knowledge is power. Click the Learn tab read about topics like Bullying, Depression, Spirituality, etc. The Tools tab has downloadable resources about positivity, healthy relationships, yoga poses and more. Click the Stories tab to read stories submitted by other teens. You may also speak to a trusted therapist, school counselor or religious leader.
  • Teenagers and especially boys, can be very immature. This is often because teens are still young. You can try to be more understanding of this.
  • You can give this boy a second chance and try talking to him again. Since you’re too young to date, you can consider being friends with him for the moment. He might have felt embarrassed that people were making jokes and stopped talking to you because of peer pressure, and not because he didn’t like you as a person. People who truly love each other are often best friends first.
  • You can try not to take it too hard if this boy doesn’t want to talk to you anymore because nobody’s perfect. There are plenty of other boys to choose from that you can date when you’re old enough. Look forward to the future by staying positive and do the things you enjoy now.
  • You can be positive by repeating positive affirmations to yourself. Stay hopeful for the future by always having something to look forward to. You may also let your feelings out by writing them down in a daily journal, or write down a few things you’re grateful for each day. Be yourself by genuinely expressing your feelings, doing the things you enjoy and spending time with people who genuinely care about you.
  • You can use creativity to express your feelings in a healthy way by coloring in a coloring book, painting, drawing, doing creative writing, playing a musical instrument or listening to music among other things.
  • Being more spiritual can help you understand that everything happens for a reason, learn to accept the things you can’t change and have peace of mind. Spiritual techniques include meditation, prayer and yoga. You may also attend church services.
  • You can learn more about relationships by visiting the Teen Central website, clicking the Tools tab and downloading the resources called 8 Signs of Healthy Relationships and 8 Signs of Unhealthy Relationships.
  • No one deserves to be treated badly by boys or anyone. Practice self-care by taking care of your mind, body and spirit. For example, eat healthy, exercise regularly, take care of your mental health and use spiritual techniques on a regular basis among other things.
  • You can get away from thinking about boys for a while by volunteering to help those less fortunate. Some ways to volunteer include helping out at a pet shelter, planting trees, speaking out against bullies, reading to children at your local library or donating gently used items to those in need among other things. You may also foster or adopt a dog or cat from a local pet shelter. Find opportunities that you can do online or in your area by visiting websites like Volunteermatch.

HELP YOURSELF:

  • In what ways can having a positive mindset help you live a better life now and in the future?
  • In what ways do boys think differently than girls?
  • What can you learn from this experience, and how can you let it make you a stronger person?
  • In what ways do you deserve to have a boyfriend who will treat you right, be your real friend and love you as yourself?
  • In what ways do bullies affect people, and how can this problem be solved?