Stories

My mind is torn

By May 20, 2021No Comments

I have been diagnosed with depression. I am on anti-depressants so my mind isn’t as bad anymore but i also feel like it made it worse. Some days I love life and appreciate it then some days i wake up and hate myself, school, and life. Its like the medication helped me 60% but the 40% of negative thoughts still come back after the slightest inconvenience. I can’t deal with it anymore. Do i like life or not. Am i confident in myself or not. Do i want to be successful or not. My mind is torn and cant fully decided on one thing anymore. I think it was easier being fully depressed. My dad thinks I’m possessed. I want to stop taking my medication. I cant function anymore

THINGS TO DO FIRST

  • Thank you for sharing your story with us at TeenCentral. Depression is not something you have to or should experience alone. It takes courage to reach out for help and we applaud you for taking the necessary steps to get help.
  • While you are working through your depression, it’s important to know what resources you have available to you. If at any point you begin to feel unsafe, or need to reach out to an impartial person, use the resource Crisis Textline. This service is available 24/7. Just text “HELLO” to 741741 or visit www.crisistextline.org. There are other resources listed on TeenCentral under HELP in case you’d like to check them out.
  • It is important that you continue to talk about how you are feeling and the depression symptoms you are experiencing. Who can you trust to talk to? This may be a guidance counselor, your doctor, or a relative. Medication can be helpful with depression, but often not effective alone. Talking about your feelings is important.

WHEN YOU ARE UP FOR IT

  • There are many resources located on TeenCentral. If you go under LEARN there is an entire section on Depression that may help you as you cope with your current situation. There is also a Depression Workbook in the TOOLS section. You may find that completing the exercises in this workbook allow you to express what you are feeling. This can then be shared with a trusted person when you are sharing your feelings with them.
  • What healthy activities, things, and people make you happy? Surround yourself with them. Sometimes physical activity, a walk or aerobic exercise, will help your body respond to depression by engaging endorphins. Prefer artistic expression? Pour your thoughts and feeling out by drawing a picture, painting, or journaling.
  • You talked about having good days and bad days, as well as inconveniences. Keep track of them by keeping a journal. What is happening on these days? Who is surrounding you on these days? What are the inconveniences? What coping mechanisms did you try? Did they work? Keeping track may help you in communicating that to the necessary people. It can also help you find what helps you feel better or what makes you feel worse. You can then try to make adjustments to use skills that help improve coping and your mood.