So the guy who wrote the letter came and told me and of course I told my best friend. Also it wasn’t her BF. I have decided that I value my friendships with my friend and her BF more than a date. Moving on everybody at school keeps talking about me liking him (Which I wasn’t sure if I liked him to begin with) and it is getting on me and my friends nerves. Help!
SOME MORE WAYS TO HELP YOURSELF:
- Welcome back to TeenCentral! We appreciate that you trusted us enough to return for more support. Unfortunately, working through situations like this doesn’t usually involve a once and done solution. It takes a lot of strength and resiliency to navigate relationship related issues… especially school age ones. On a side note – Way to stick to your values! Be proud of that!
- The last time you wrote, we did mention the various resources under our TOOLS and LEARN tabs that could be beneficial. Hopefully you have taken the time to check these out and maybe utilize a few. If at any time you feel like the people talking about you may be bullying, we do have a section on Bullying under the LEARN tab. We also encourage you to keep checking out the stories that others have submitted. There are tons related to high school dating and relationships.
- It sounds like you had pretty good communication with your best friend and it helped you get a better understanding of what was happening. Great job. Are there any adults at school you feel comfortable talking with that may help you manage the “rumor mill”? Have you gotten any feedback from a parent or trusted family adult? Aside from this, remember you know the truth of the situation. If you feel comfortable correcting anyone in a positive and appropriate way then do so. If you chose to ignore it, that’s also up to you. You have the choice on how you respond to people speaking about you.
- Last time we suggested journaling, but have you ever tried art journaling? It can be extremely helpful as an outlet for your frustrations and feelings especially if you feel at all like talking to friends or school staff about it won’t work. Sometimes expressing all the things you wish you could say to people in a wordless way can be very therapeutic. We’d encourage you to read the What’s new blog on art journaling just for a few ideas on how to get started. CLICK HERE so you don’t have to search for it.
- It seems like you are doing well with focusing on yourself and the positive things that are important to you. Stick with it! Staying busy is a good way to distract yourself from the parts of this situation that bother you – like the gossip. What are the things you like to do in your spare time? Can you come up with some kind of game plan for when you’re at school and hear people talk about you?
- Another important aspect of helping yourself is continuing to surround yourself with the positive people who make you feel good and happy. Try not to waste time or energy on those who talk negatively about you or spread gossip. Who are the positive people who can support you and you enjoy being around – both at school and at home?