I am in love with my girlfriend. We have been dating for about seven months. I should say really long months. This is our story from my perspective. From day 1! It was the start of February and I had just gotten out of a relationship about 4 months ago. She, on the other hand, had gotten cheated on a couple of months ago. My personality is very bubbly and friendly. The bell had just rang and we all where leaving for our next class. That is when I saw her. We started talking and through snap chat exchanged numbers. We would text sometimes because I was not really in the mind to have another girlfriend right then. A few weeks went by and she came to school with this really dope headband (that to this day I still have). As soon as I saw it i texted her and said ” aye let me have that” (with a cool face emoji). She texted back really fast and told me “you cant have it, but I have something else you might think is cool). She then sent me these really rawww! pair of socks. From there we went to the bathroom and we started to chat it up and somehow she ended up with my headband a on foot of my socks. I have one of each of hers. Our relationship went to the moon from there. We texted and face-timed every day, and then after about 3 to four weeks of us talking my mom found out that I was talking to another girl. I got my phone taken and was told to never talk to or look at her ever again, which I did not listen to. A couple weeks went by of us not talking, My mom let me and my sister go to my aunt’s house and I talked to her non-stop for only a weekend. On that Sunday night when I had to go back to my mom’s house, I asked her to be my girlfriend. Even through all of the stuff that I knew was going to happen, she still said yes. About 2-3 months into our relationship I was able to get a table from my “Angel Mom” (we will get more into her in the next story) and got in trouble because my mom was snooping around and asking about me to little kids. Fast forward to the 5th month. I got an Iphone 7 from one of my closest cousins and then an android from one of my other male cousins. During that time it was the best, besides the part where me and my mom got into it about something super dumb. I ended up taking her car every night for just one week and also smoked weed for that one week also. Somehow she now says that I have five tickets which is really mind blowing. Anyway, I may tell that story some other time. But that Friday night of that week I got my phones taken because she made my sibling tell her everything. I would talk to her some nights when my mother was at work due to two of my siblings letting me use their phones. Yesterday was the first time since March that we were able to see each other. I really loved it. Even though she was really nervous it was kinda cute. Hopefully we get through this and don’t have to end our relationship because of my (homophobic) mother and her husband.
HELP YOURSELF
- Thank you for returning to the TeenCentral community and telling your story. Sharing your stories with us is such a benefit to others in this community. It helps you and others know that they are NOT alone. You telling your story may help other young people come forward and have the bravery to talk about THEIR stories. So I just want to thank you for that!
- It must be difficult to feel as though your mother doesn’t support your choices in relationships. Have you tried asking her to sit down with you and expressing how you feel? These conversations are often difficult, so it may be beneficial to prepare a list of what you’d like to say to express your feelings. Keep in mind that how you present yourself in a conversation oftentimes has a dramatic effect in the outcome. You may want to practice the conversation on another trusted adult first and get feedback.
- Have you tried finding ways to show your mother that you are a young person capable of making well thought out decisions, and that your feelings should be heard? Oftentimes how we respond to our feelings of anger/ frustration can make a situation more/ less difficult, and often distract from the real issue at hand. If these conversations ever get out of hand or if they ever leave you feeling depressed or like you want to harm yourself please take a look at the many helplines we have listed on the HELP tab. Choose one that you think relates most to your situation and give them a call. You will receive a more immediate response than you may get from TeenCentral if you feel your really in trouble in that moment.
- You may have already looked here, but on Teen Central we have a section on LGBTQ in our LEARN tab that has a section about coming out. You may have already had this discussion with you mother, however it may help to guide you in the right direction with other aspects of the discussion you could have.
CONSIDER THIS
- Do you have any interests or hobbies that you can use when you feel upset that would be considered positive and safe? If you need to get energy out, you could try joining a sports team, or jogging or yoga for something more individualized. If you’re more of an artist, is there something musically or artistically that you could do to let out your frustrations?
- Have you thought about asking your mother if the two of you can talk to a trusted professional together? If your conversations often end in arguing, this may be a great place to start with someone to help you meet in the middle.
