I am a 14 year old girl that gets high or trips on acid everyday to escape the pain and horror of my home life.Iits the only way to let my fear go and to be happy even if its for that moment. I like to think I can control it just like I did with my eating disorder but turns out I was wrong .My anger also gets to the point where I’ve punched and choked out my sister for looking at me wrong . I am so tired of all of this and would love to help myself but my dad is too blind too see anything and thinks I’m just creating problems for myself all by myself when in reality its the both of us. I’m done with all of it, the pain the yelling the hitting the hurt that goes on everyday. I just cant stand to wake up every morning and see myself in the mirror knowing today is going to be equally bad or worse and I’m just waiting for the day where I finally am not scared or live in fear and I finally end it all. Who knows that day might be tonight or it might be tomorrow. I am just so over all of this. I can’t do it. I hurt everyone everyday including myself. I’m done.
Consider This:
- Thanks for sharing your pain on TeenCentral. It sounds incredibly hard every day for you and you are a strong person for taking it day by day. It also sounds like you are willing to get to get some help. If your Dad is not the person to get you help, reach out to another trusted adult who can help you. Do not stop until you find someone who is willing to help. This could be a friend of the family, it could be a school counselor or teacher, or a mental health professional in your community. It is important to talk to an adult who will help you find counseling and not just blow it off like you are over dramatizing the situations.
- If you need some one to talk to right away, feel free to contact the National Teen Hotline Center at 1-800-273-TALK. They are available 24 hours a day to talk to you when you need someone.
- Try very hard to get yourself off drugs. You might need the help of an adult to do this and counseling is important as well. We know you do not really want to hurt your sister because you mentioned in your story how you do not like taking your anger and frustration out on her. This is one of the reasons why you need to get help. Your sister looks to you for guidance.
Help Yourself:
- Who is an adult you can talk to about your situation and how would you share you need help?
- How can you use your sister to motivate you to stay clean and get help?
- How do you think counseling could help you have a better life?
