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I’ll probably be writing in a a lot. My A.D.D. has gotten better and I’m having more success concentrating in school and otherwise. My psychotic obsessions haven’t popped up in a while. The manic depression still hits me as hard as ever, though. I was doing well, but the other day I started to cut myself again. Everything around me is currently in chaos. My girlfriend and I have similar problems. Sometimes when hers get bad, I end up coming home late because I can’t leave her the way she is at the time. My dad plays it off like it’s some wish-washy little nothing (he uses the word “crisis” in a sickeningly sarcastic way). Then, he says (like he knows) that her problems aren’t as bad as mine. But they are! He implies that since my problems aren’t as bad as his used to be, they aren’t problems or they don’t count, so I should just shut up and smile. That gets me so mad that I cut myself. I hurt for her, so I cut myself. I want to get away from my parents who can’t, or won’t, understand. But I can’t, so I cut myself. I hate myself for it.
CONSIDER THIS:
- Thank you for continuing to share your struggles here at teencentral. your problems are always valid.
- Self harm is never the answer to any problems. It is a very dangerous addiction which can lead to blood and bone infections and require stitching. Please talk to a trusted adult (other than parents in your situation) and seek out therapy and medication for your ADD and Bipolar disorders even if you are on medications already.
- It is good that you are trying to help your girlfriend with her problems but they seem to be causing you more stress and anxiety. Having someone who understands and is going though similar situations is both useful in the way that they understand and can help you though your problems. It can also be trigger your own anxiety if you feel you need to solve their problems for them or if they are too caught up in their own struggles.
- Parents often do not understand how their reactions affect us emotionally, mentally and physically. Explain to your parents that you are trying to advocate for yourself and also help your girlfriend.
HELP YOURSELF:
- What other coping skills have helped you deal with your ADD and Bipolar Disorder and improved your concentration?
- How do you feel after talking to your girlfriend about your struggles? How do you feel after she shares hers?
- What do you think your father would say if you explained to him that you take his comments as if he be leaves that your problems aren’t serious? How would he react if you took the time to tell him about your problems?
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