I got mad at my dad and cut myself. My dad was saying rude stuff about my mom. Now its been about a month and I haven’t been to his house. Now the judge wants me and my dad to have counseling. I don’t want to see him ever again. What do I do? Do I forgive him or not?
CONSIDER THIS:
- Having issues with your dad can make you feel frustrated and confused. You are strong and smart for enduring your dad’s irresponsible behavior and making an honest effort to fix the situation even though he isn’t.
- Cutting yourself is a serious problem. You can head to the Teen Central website and click the Learn tab then Self Injury to better understand this dangerous issue. You may want to see a trusted therapist to talk about it. Commit to self-love every day so you can understand the importance of your own life.
- Forgiving someone doesn’t mean you have to accept what they did to you or others. You’ll also be able to let go of your negative feelings. For these reasons and more forgiveness is best.
- You and your dad may benefit from counseling. A counselor can help you both learn strategies to prevent you both from arguing. Your dad probably has issues he has to deal with too. You can try to tell him this kindly, without judgment, to help him and convince him of the benefits of counseling. Make sure you can trust the counselor by speaking clearly and responsibly. They should listen to what you say in a professional, empathetic manner without blaming you.
- Find something else to focus on besides the situation your dad forced on you. Do activities you might enjoy like listening to music, doing art or learning something new. Read a book or spend time with a pet. Find something to laugh at like a humorous picture or watch a funny movie to forget about things.
- You’re a good person for caring about your dad’s disrespectful attitude towards your mom. If you may not be able to fix the situation you can try volunteering to bring positive energy into the world. Some ways to volunteer are helping animals, the environment or children in need. Choose something that fits your personality, is meaningful in some way to you or helps you fight against your situation in a genuinely good way.
- You can head to the Teen Central website then click the Help tab to call one of the hotlines if you need someone to talk to.
- It may be best to find someone else you can trust to stay with like your mom or a relative who understands you.
- Some people turn to spirituality to help them get through hard times. You can go to the Teen Central website then click the Learn tab then Spirituality to learn more. Try yoga, prayer or meditation to calm yourself down and raise your spirits. This can also help you be more patient so you don’t have to fight with your dad so much.
- You can write down your feelings in a journal to express them in a healthy, positive way.
HELP YOURSELF:
- In what other ways can you benefit from forgiving your dad?
- How can you control yourself so you don’t get in trouble even if it’s not your fault?
- How could getting a break away from your dad allow you to think more clearly?
- In what ways can you keep yourself safe from being bullied by your dad?
- What are some ways you can engage in a positive activity to help yourself feel better?
