I Don’t Know If I’m the Problem or My Mom Just Neglects Me

Ever since I turned 12, my life also turned upside down. My mom yells at me more, hits me with a belt, confiscates my phone and laptop and I don’t know why. Because of that, I’ve become more secretive. If i don’t eat because I am still full, she forces me to and threatens me to confiscate my phone. Recently, we got into a big fight (I’m already 13 turning 14). I was doing a study break after I finished an hour and twenty minute study and she yelled at me that I wasn’t even studying and just used it as a reason so that she won’t give my phone back. That wasn’t true. I showed my sister the proof that I’ve been studying for an hour but she couldn’t care less so I defended myself, not shouting, and telling her that it’s just a break. But then she got the belt and hit me like 5-8 times and slapped me. She pulled my hair and dragged me so that I could fall into my chair and told me that everyone around me just stays with me out of pity and I am such a disappointment. I know she regretted having me but I never asked to be born. I’m the youngest, and the only reason they had me is so that my older sister could make me a barbie doll. It hurts knowing that they only had you for someone’s satisfaction.

Help Yourself

• It must be so difficult to live with that kind of fear and disappointment in the people around you.  Thank you for reaching out for someone to help.
• First and foremost, everyone has the right to feel safe in their lives.  If you don’t feel safe and people are hurting you, it’s important to speak up to someone to help.  If you are in immediate danger, you can contact your local authorities to assist you.
• Do you have another trusted adult or authority figure in your life that you can talk to about what’s happening to you?  If not, you could also try contact the Crisis Textline at the below.  They’re available 24/7 if needed.

  Crisis Textline
  Available 24/7
  Support to all individuals in crisis

  Text “HELLO” to 741741
  www.crisistextline.org

Consider This

• Our Teen Central website has a link dedicated to getting help for abuse.  If you need more resources or suggestions to help you help yourself, please consider going into our website under the Help tab and clicking on the section under “What’s New” entitled Getting Help for Abuse On Your Own
• On our website we also have a “Learn” tab with a topic on Families.  This section has some great information on cognitive traps and journal topics to help you work effectively through some of the thoughts you’re having.  You may want to consider keeping a journal for yourself- it can be a great way to express yourself without worrying about judgement.
• Do you have any interests that you use for healthy stress relief for yourself?  Do you like to take walks, jog, listen, write or play music, draw, paint, write?  Anything you can do somewhere that you can take some time to yourself to relax and recharge.  You may even want to put these ideas somewhere to remind you that you have these options when you don’t feel like you’ll remember them.  These shortcuts can help when you feel overwhelmed.