I think I’m losing my friends. My best friend of four years barely talks to me anymore and my other friends just let me sit with them at lunch, but they don’t really care about me. I’ve always been terrible at making friends so when I do find friends its a big deal for me. These are people I’ve known since 5th-6th grade and they’re just done with me now. I try to make friends in my classes but i don’t have social media because my parents are strict so its hard. I’m so used to feeling lonely at this point it doesn’t even bother me
HELP YOURSELF:
- It sounds like you feel so lonely thinking you’re losing your friends. What a sad feeling to have. Thank you for sharing this painful experience with Teen Central. We support you!
- It sounds like something may have changed between you and your friends lately. You mention having a best friend for a long time, and other friends at school. Can you think about anything that may have happened that caused some conflict between you and your friends? Have you tried talking to them about feeling distant or disconnected?
- Sometimes when we feel overwhelmingly lonely, we forget there are people that we can talk to. Do you have anyone in your life that you can trust to talk with about this painful problem with your friends? A teacher, a guidance counselor, maybe your parents or another family member? People of all ages know what it’s like to have, and sometimes lose friends. It’s very possible if you open up to someone you’ll be surprised to learn your not alone.
WHEN YOU’RE READY:
- Believe it or not, good friendships starts with liking and feeling good about yourself. Have you considered if some of what happening with your friends has anything to do with how you’ve been feeling lately? Are you struggling with something in your life that’s making you feel really sad or irritable that they may be noticing and responding to? Consider using some journaling to think through how you’ve been doing lately. In the What’s New section, there’s a blog about using Journaling to Relieve Stress that may be helpful.
- Take some time to think about what makes it hard for you to make friends? You’re not alone in feeling this way. Lots of people feel really anxious and stressed when they’re trying to fit in and connect with people their own age and branch out beyond their family to have relationships with other people. Are you super-nervous around people that makes talking to other difficult? If so, try checking out our Social Skills resource in our TOOLS section. Are your current friends upset about something that’s just not resolved? If so, try writing a letter to them if it feels too difficult to talk with them.
- What are you doing to take care of yourself in the midst of all this stress? Don’t forget that you need care for yourself while you’re figuring out how to pay attention and build relationships with others. Check out the MPE TOOLKIT in TOOLS for some information about different ways to take care of yourself as well as the WELLNESS section in LEARN and lots of tools for YOGA in TOOLS.
