My mom wont let me go to my guidance counselor anymore because I go there a lot and she doesn’t want me to miss anymore classes, but I’m done with this. I don’t wanna die, but I don’t wanna live, but I don’t even know. I feel purposeless and like no one cares and all my friends are stressed so I can’t talk to them. I have too many problems so I push everyone away but I just want this all to be over. I want to die but I want to live. I’m so confused and I hate myself and my life and what i do. I dont do anything right and people always get mad at me and I don’t wanna do this anymore. Help me please.
HELP YOURSELF
- Thank you for sharing your story with TeenCentral. This sounds like a very confusing, frustrating, and emotional time for you . Most importantly it is important to make sure that you are safe!
- If you are having feelings to want to hurt yourself in anyway please make sure that you are reaching out for help. This can be done by contacting the National Suicide Hotline. I have put the link, and number below. If you do not feel as though you want to talk to someone right away you can also text the crisis hotline ” Hello” at 741741.
National Suicide Hotline
Available 24/7
Helps individuals in suicidal crisis with support
1-800-273-8255
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org
http://www.suicide.org/international-suicide-hotlines.html
- It is most important to talk about how you are feeling. This should be done by talking to an adult that you trust. I know that you had mentioned that your mom does not want you to go your guidance counselor anymore. Do you think that maybe also talking to her about how you are feeling could ease some of the tension as to why you are going to your counselor at all? If you feel as though you cant go to the counselor or your parent is there any other adult that you would be able to reach out to such as a mentor, religious leader, or another family member?
CONSIDER THIS
- It is important for us to often process through how we are feeling and what is going on within our mind. I feel as though writing things down often helps me. This can be done by journaling. When we journal we process through information differently allowing us to think about what is going on and the emotions that we are feeling. The information is sent through multiple parts of the brain, and then comes out on the page. If you are not someone that likes to journal you could also show your creative side and draw or color how you are feeling.
- We have some great resources on TeenCentral for both Wellness activities, and Mindfulness. We also have quit a few options in our TOOLS section as well. There is a great one that uses mindfulness while incorporating music. It is called “The Music Tool” . This might allow for you to calm down the anxiety that might be occurring. You could also visit our LEARN section on Depression which offers a lot of information on feelings and the importance of self-care.
- The most important thing again is making sure that you are safe. Taking the first steps for that can be hard, but they are important ones. Again, talking to your mom could be beneficial. Maybe she would be able to assist you in getting in touch with another type of professional such as a therapist that could work through what is causing you to have these thoughts and feelings.