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My parents think I am straight…

By April 2, 2020No Comments

…but I am dating a girl and we love each other.

So I told my mom that I am lesbian and she totally flipped out she started trying to trick me into think I am straight but I know I am not so I went to school and told some of my friends one of my friends name was (girl)*. (Girl) was a sweet lesbian girl that I had liked since 6th grade and she was so sweet and stuck by my side until my parent forgot about it. After they had forgot about it I went over to (girl)’s to spend the night for her birthday. We had so much fun, it was the most fun I had in years. when I got home my parents didn’t suspect a thing even though I had made out with (girl) last night. The next week passed and I invited her over and she spent the night at my house and my older brother invited his friend so with the four of us we played true or dare. And my brother dared my to french kiss (girl) and we did, it was the best. The next week my brother told my mom and dad and they told me that they were going to send me to gay conversion therapy or I need to be straight. So I told them I will be straight, which I wasn’t but they don’t know that. I am dating (girl) now and we want to meet up but my parents wont let me. What should I do? Should I move out and we share an apartment at 16? Or wait til we’re 18?

HELP YOURSELF

  • You have a lot going on right now, this must feel very difficult. We hope that you will find the help you need on Teen Central!
  • There are a lot of helpful resources right here on our site if you check out the LEARN and TOOLS tabs. Here you’ll be able to find communication worksheets, information on the LGBTQ+ community, a budget guide worksheet, and so much more that may help you to better organize your thoughts.
  • When there is turmoil within the family setting, tensions can run high, especially when everyone lives under the same roof. Take a little bit of time every single day for yourself, and make sure you are eating well, hydrating, and getting some movement in. The better you feel, the better you are able to navigate stress and confusing decisions.

CONSIDER THIS

  • While we may disagree with parents sometimes, maybe even often, many teenagers may feel as though they have to bend to the wishes of their parents. Would it be possible to reach out to a counseling center, or family therapist to help bridge this gap between your parents? Having a mediator can help families communicate better, and get through disagreements in a positive way.
  • You are asking some very big questions. Take a moment, and write down all of your options on paper. Once you have a list, challenge each choice with questions. Can you afford to live on your own in an apartment? Where are you able to find the financial, and emotional support that you need? Will you continue going to school until graduation, or find a job instead? How would these choices affect your life 10 years down the road? This may help you to determine which choice is the most realistic given the scenario.
  • Who do you trust that you can reach out to for support? Teen Central is here to help, but sometimes it is useful to have an in-person conversation with someone who has life experience. Are you able to connect with a guidance counselor, coach, teacher, religious leader, aunt or uncle, etc. who may be able to listen to you without judgement?
  • Most importantly: Are you being kind to yourself? You are the most important person in your own life, make sure you are doing things every day to nurture yourself. What can you do to help yourself feel vitalized and energized?

*name removed for protection of anonymity