Talking About Suicide

Suicide is a sensitive topic, and while there has been more support for mental health in our country lately, the stigma around suicide still exists. There may be conversations happening in school, online, and outside of school.

Don’t be afraid to talk about suicide. You will not put ideas into someone’s head about suicide just by talking about it. Talking could save someone’s life.

We will lose more lives due to silence. 

Here are some helpful hints when talking about suicide with others.

• Never describe suicide as:
  • Selfish
  • Stupid
  • Cowardly or weak
  • That it was an “the easy way out”
  • That it’s a sin (or that the person is going to hell)

Actually – Let’s just leave the shaming language out of it all together!

• Avoid using words like:
  • “Committed suicide”
  • “Successful/Unsuccessful attempt”
  • “Failed attempt”
  • “Suicide gesture”

This implies that suicide has a positive goal, rather than focusing on the pain that the individual is feeling.

• Instead, a better way to describe it might be…
  • “Died by suicide”
  • “Took their own life”

• Steer clear from describing risk factors for suicide as
  • Unexplainable
  • Without warning
  • Happened because of one single event

Risk factors may be complicated, and very difficult to predict, but not impossible.  Instead, educate yourself and others on the risk factors for suicide or the verbal and behavioral cues for suicide.

IF A SUICIDE HAPPENED NEAR YOU

We know this would be HARD, but if a suicide happened in your school or community…

• Avoid spreading news about specific details concerning the suicide (if you know those details) including:
  • The method used
  • Graphic images of any kind
  • Details about the location
  • Notes or messages left behind or texts sent

• Avoid listening to or looking at….
  • Graphic images over and over or trying to find more of them.
  • Details about the event you don’t already know
  • Reading/listening about it again and again.
  • Stories about what happened over and over.

Doing this is likely to increase post-traumatic stress symptoms. It can be very traumatizing for you or someone else and is not information that is helpful to pass around.

Talking about suicide and talking to others who might be considering it…

CONVERSATION PHRASES that may be helpful if you are talking to a friend who is upset about a student death…

• “If you’ve heard that it was a suicide how does that change things for you?”
• “It seems really important to you to find out if it was a suicide.” (validating statement)
• “Are you worried about this? Would you like me to go with you to talk to someone about it?” (Connect your friend to help.)
• “It’s hard, but we may never know for sure.”

IF YOU ARE WORRIED THAT YOUR FRIEND OR FAMILY MEMBER MIGHT BE HAVING A SUICIDE CRISIS

You may not be able to take away their pain but offering them HOPE can keep them alive.

• DO: Provide Lifeline information. If you or someone you know is in distress or crisis:
  • Try to stay with the person until they are connected with a helpful adult. BUT – If the friend or family member insists on leaving you, go and find an adult to help you. You can’t force the person to stay with you, and it’s not your fault if they refuse to stay with you.
  • You can suggest that your friend or family member contact the Suicide Prevention Lifeline by dialing 988 – You also can call this number if you are feeling upset!
  • Another option is to TEXT the Crisis Text Line at 741-741 Start a conversation by texting “HOME” to that number.

Seek help — you do NOT (and definitely should not) have to go about this alone!

• Things that you CAN say to a person who may be going through a suicide crisis:
  • “Are you OK?”
  • “Do you need anything?”
  • “Are you thinking about killing yourself?”
  • “How can I support you?”
  • “I want you to be here.”
  • “Will you let me get you help?”
  • “Will you let me go with you to get some help?”

Helpful Information: (from the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention at Suicide Prevention | Suicide Prevention | CDC.)

RESOURCES from TeenCentral.com:

More helpful information can be found on the TeenCentral LEARN tab:

•  Click here for information on DEPRESSION
•  Click here for information on SUICIDE

Helpful downloadable tools can be found on our TOOLS tab:

• Click here for a free downloadable workbook on DEPRESSION
• Click here for a free downloadable resource on conversation starters with friends you think might be at risk for SUICIDE
• Click here for a free downloadable SUPPORT PLAN
• Click here for a free downloadable MOOD TRACKER
• Click here for a free downloadable DAILY POSITIVE REMINDER
• Click here for a free downloadable POSITIVE SELF TALK TOOL

TeenCentral believes that all people no matter the age or situation have worth and value, including you – Reader of this blog! This world needs you and always remember – you are not alone!

Stay well~