so there’s this guy i like. like, REALLY like. and i think my love for him is starting to get unhealthy. i’ll provide context.
i started liking him probably around april. he was, and still is, everything i look for in someone. we’d talk whenever we could, and i enjoyed his company. may is when it started to get bad. i didn’t have a way of contacting him, and i didn’t want to use his school e-mail and look like a freak, so i pushed through in hopes i could ask for contact information during the end of the school year. during our last week of school, i couldn’t stand the thought of leaving him alone. whenever we parted ways to go home, i felt like i was going to be sick, and had the strongest urges to just go back and watch him, just to make sure he was fine + talk to him more. i thought about him frequently.
once i finally exchanged contact information with him, all i wanted to do was talk to him, day in and day out. and i still do. we mainly talk at night, and every minute of it is amazing. but, obviously, it’s getting worse and worse by the minute. i’m borderline obsessed with him and i want to do nothing more but be by his side 24/7. he’s all i can think about how. he’s my motivation for doing simple tasks, like getting out of bed and going about my life. i heard he had a crush a few months and i felt pure anger.
yesterday we didn’t talk, and i felt like i was going to die right then and there. i can’t stand not talking to him.
i’m not entirely sure what to do, so i came here. any and all suggestions are welcomed.
HELP YOURSELF:
- It sounds as if you are feeling a little overwhelmed right now and trying hard to cope with your thoughts. We appreciate you choosing to share with our community here at TeenCentral.
- Consider looking at our LEARN tab under the subheading Relationships. You might be able to evaluate whether you feel that you are in a healthy relationship. From the sounds of your story, you may have some of your own concerns about how healthy this relationship is for you and/or the other person.
- Talk to a trusted adult or professional about your concerns. You are very articulate and in tuned to your thoughts and feelings. Use those communication strengths and link up with an adult in your life who can help you. Consider a guidance counselor, parent, aunt/uncle, family friend, therapist.
CONSIDER THIS ALSO:
- After looking at our LEARN tab about relationships, try looking at and determining for yourself what you think are healthy boundaries. Here is a website that discusses some things that “Teens Need to Know About Boundaries” from Very Well Family: Boundaries: What Every Teen Needs to Know (verywellfamily.com)
- Healthy boundaries as well as healthy outlets are a part of development and relationships. In addition to determining healthy dating boundaries, consider finding something that helps you really feel “yourself” such as art, journaling, hiking, being with animals, singing, dancing, wood working, and the such. Not only can you do these things yourself, but you can also join clubs and/or groups of similar minded people. Focus on yourself and finding what makes you happy and you might not be so focused on other people.
