I don’t know what to do. I have a habit of whenever I hear someone talking I always ask them what they are talking about and they get mad. I really need to break this habit but for some reason I can’t. What should I do.
- First, we would like to thank you for having the courage to share your story with TeenCentral community. Be proud of yourself for reaching out for help!
- Have you asked anyone such as a trusted adult to talk with you about this problem? Let them know you are struggling with this and would like help. Perhaps reach out to your parents and/or a family member and explain to them how this is making you feel. If this is not an option for you would you consider talking with a guidance counselor? You might be surprised how helpful a good old-fashioned face to face conversation can be sometimes.
- You mentioned that other people “get mad”. We are hoping that these situations don’t turn into bullying, social exclusion or violence. Dealing with difficult peer interactions even if you made a mistake, can be stressful. If the stress ever gets to be too much and you start to have unsafe feelings please text the Crisis Textline by texting “HOME” to 741741 or chat online at www.crisistextline.org.
- A quick idea for you might be to carry a notebook with you. When you’re around people and you are tempted to interrupt conversations that don’t include you open the notebook and start making some notes about what you imagine these people might be talking about. I bet if you start making these notes they may reveal to you why you are impulsively jumping in and asking what people are talking about without an invitation to join the conversation. For example, could it be that you are anxious about others talking about you behind your back? Or are you worried that you might be missing out on something fun that they are planning?
- Here on TeenCentral we have a section called Tools if you take a look at the Social Skills tab. It has suggestions that you might be able to use, like starting or ending a conversation, clarifying when you don’t understand something that’s being said or done, and many more. We think reviewing some of these ideas would a good idea for you.
- It is very important to work on yourself and feel more confident in how you communicate with others. In the Tools section there is also a tab called Positive Self Talk. Check out ways you can improve how you feel about yourself.
- Always, remember to keep your chin up and look for solutions that will work best for you. Keep growing and keep learning that’s how we get better!