Hi, I’m having problems at home and they’re really affecting my life right now.
I live with an abusive and narcissistic mother and she has messed up my mental health. She always hits me no matter what I do, yells at me 24/7, and always thinks she is right just because she is the mother. This happened in the past when I was around 11 or 12 (I am 14 now). She made me so depressed and I never wanted to talk to anyone, leave my room, or do anything at all. She even made me so depressed that I wanted to commit suicide. When I went to the doctor and was diagnosed with mild to severe depression, she yelled at me and said I was lying instead of trying to understand me or help me. She did the same thing when I told my counselor that I didn’t want to live anymore. I love her and know she is my mom, but I don’t know what to do anymore. I have nobody to tell since my dad always says “Don’t let it get to you, she is your mother and she can do anything she wants”. No matter how many times I tell him I am sensitive and I take things very personally easily, he always says the same thing. He doesn’t listen to me when I tell him that it is not easy for me to do that. She doesn’t let me hang out with my friends or even call and text them. She blames me for anything bad that happens to her and it hurts me so much because I’m not trying to hurt her or ruin her life. Every time I talk to her, she starts yelling and a fight starts. I understand that I am not the perfect daughter but I always apologize at the end of the day. I really don’t know what to do with my life and I feel like my mom doesn’t love me. What should I do? please help 🙁
Help Yourself:
It seems like you’re going through a very difficult time right now, thank you for having the courage to reach out and share your story with TeenCentral. Be proud of yourself for reaching out for help.
It sounds like everything you’re going through at home has made you feel depressed to the point where you wanted to commit suicide, sorry to hear that. Have you thought about suicide since then? If so, please know there is someone you can talk to you. You can reach out to the National Suicide Line at 988lifeline.org, it’s free and confidential, they’re available 24/7.
You mentioned talking to a counselor, that’s a great idea! Talking to a guidance counselor or a therapist is a great job to let out your frustrations or concerns. They may help give you suggestions or ideas on things to do that could help. Being able to get your feelings out can help feel like a weight is lifted shoulders, might help the tough times feel just a little bit easier to cope with.
You also mentioned feeling like your mom doesn’t love you, am sorry that must really hurt. Here on TeenCentral under the “Learn” tab we have a section on “Family.” It talks about differences between family relationships and suggestions or ideas on how to help, check it out. We also have a section on “Anxiety” and “Depression.”
Consider This:
Have you tried working on different tools to help you cope with what you’re going through? Check out some of these resources:
- Writing/Journaling – Writing your thoughts and feelings is a great way to release some frustrations rather than bottling them up. It also helps puts things in order and better express oneself. You can choose to share your journal instead of talking about it or not. Some journal questions starters could be – “today am feeling (__) and this is why,” or “3 things that happened to me today.” You can also check out My Support Plan on the “Tools” tab, it helps you identify thoughts and symptoms and how you’re going to help yourself?
- Music – sometimes listening to music that resonates with you or has positive message can be an outlet to release your emotions. Check out this Music Tool activity also under the “Tools” tab.
- Self-Talk or Positive Mantra – reading and saying positive quotes can help with your mood. They can be specific or general about life. Check out this Positive Reminder activity or this Positive Self Talk.
We at TeenCentral thank you for reaching out and are wishing you all the best.
