I haven’t been too long graduated high school and I feel hopeless. I don’t know what to do. There are a lot of things that I want to accomplish in life but it doesn’t seem like it’s going to happen. I’ve been stuck in a rut for a long time and no matter how I try to free myself, it seems to get worse and never change. When I try to talk to others about this issue, it usually leads to phrases such as I have unrealistic expectations about life and I keep suffering because I do the same thing. I don’t think so. I don’t think it’s wrong to have dreams in life as long as they’re achievable and I don’t have any unrealistic expectations about anything. I just want my life to change for the better. I’m tired of suffering and struggling every day and it makes me sad to see that everything seems to come so easy to my friends and family but not to me. It feels like they are all moving ahead with their lives and I am getting further and further behind. I feel like I’m just going to die like this; never amounting to anything and never accomplishing anything. Don’t get me wrong. I am in no way suicidal but I just feel like I’ll be stuck in this situation for however long I have on this Earth. Am I crazy for thinking like this and what should I do to change?
WAYS TO HELP YOURSELF
- First, we would like to thank you for taking the time to post to TeenCentral. It can be hard to put yourself in a vulnerable place and you had the courage to ask for help!
- You mentioned that you feel stuck in a rut and have been thinking about this issue for a while now. Here on TeenCentral, we have a great tab about Anxiety that could be helpful to you. Click here to learn more about Anxiety including types, triggers, and coping skills.
- You said that when you try to talk to others they usually tell you that you have unrealistic expectations. Have you tried talking to anyone else other than friends and family? Other people that you could talk to include a guidance counselor, coach, religious leader, or a trusted teacher from school. They may have a more unbiased outlook on your concerns and be able to help you see the situation from a different perspective.
THINGS TO DO LATER
- While others have told you that your goals are unrealistic, you have mentioned that you believe they are obtainable. Here on TeenCentral we have something called a Goal Dream Catcher that can help someone plot out how and when they will meet their goals! Click here to learn more!
- Another resource on TeenCentral that could help you with decision making is our Pros and Cons/Making Hard Decisions tool. Here you can write out your dilemma, think about how it makes you feel, and even write down what steps you can take! Click here to learn more!
- Have you tried changing the way you look and talk about your accomplishments and dreams? For each goal you have, what have you done to work toward accomplishing it? Avoid phrases such as “should have” or “could have” and simply acknowledge what you “did”. Get used to doing this and it will help you change how you see where you’ve been, and help you feel more excited about where you’re going. It may even seem easier to develop the steps to your goals and feel more accomplished!
- Whatever you do- never stop dreaming. Dreams and goals are what life is made of. Maybe you want to start with some simple, short term goals that you can accomplish more easily before you tackle the difficult ones- but don’t ever stop. Be proud of yourself and your ability to dream.