I’m in a relationship with a guy with MS and he has skull tattoos and swords tattoos and kkk tattoo and confederate flag tattoo the skull and sword don’t bother me but the kkk and confederate flag makes me uncomfortable and I told me that occasionally in a relationship parters are made uncomfortable to make the other person feel wrong is that wrong and I don’t know I’m debating whether to end romantic connection and just stay friends. TC I need help and advice on what to do. I do like the man I do but I can’t get over confederate flag and kkk tattoo by anymeans.
Help Yourself:
- That certainly sounds like a tough situation to be in! Thank you for taking time to write in to TeenCeentral!
- Take some time to sit back and think about what those tattoos symbolize. Think about the person your partner is now and if they still identify with those tattoos. How that makes you feel? How do you feel about your partner in relation to who he is now, if he still stands for those values? If he does, do you stand for those values? If you have different values how does that impact your ability to stay together in a peaceful and healthy relationship?
- Have you spoken to anyone about this? Consider reaching out to a trusted adult or older sibling/cousin to help guide you through this.
Consider This:
- While exploring out website, take time to read through the Systemic Racism and Relationships pages in our Learn section. Here you will read about 8 Signs of a Healthy Relationship, Dating Violence, and Digital Communication.
- Head over to the Tools page and check out the Conflict Conversation Organizer, Fighting Fair, and Understanding Racial Micro-Aggression pages. These articles and activity sheets can help guide you through having these difficult and uncomfortable conversations with your partner, and help you to understand how his choices can potentially affect you.
