My mom brutally beats me if I don’t listen to her or I don’t agree with her on something. The items she uses to beat me with end up getting broken because of the way she beats me with them, one time she choked me with her, in the attempt to kill me and every time she beats me my body is full of bruises or I have severe body pain. My dad does nothing to stop her and thinks that she is right, he also beats up. I am currently in depression due to the physical and mental torture I have been getting for years. I have tried talking it to my other family members but they only support my parents as they don’t know about the physical torture they both have given me. I have an older sister and we both are treated just the same. I know I make mistakes and there times where I am wrong but my mistakes aren’t that severe that I am supposed to get beaten, right? I am currently 15 and I sometimes think that I should just suicide as I have been getting many suicidal thoughts recently. But I am trying to be hopeful but I don’t know for how long I will be able to hold it in. I have also tried talking to them about it but they say this is the only method for getting me in discipline and that I am wrong or else they will brutally beat me for it. Am I wrong and are they correct? And what should I do next?
WHAT TO DO NOW
- Thank you for being courageous and coming (back?) to share your story with TeenCentral. Opening up, writing it down with detail, being honest about what’s going on – these are all very BRAVE steps towards healing. If you haven’t already, please take a look around TC and read other stories from other kids who have experienced similar things (unfortunately). The reason why we recommend this is so that you and your sister know that you are NOT ALONE. Much to the dismay of TeenCentral, many children across the world deal with extreme physical abuse. This is NOT RIGHT, but you are not alone.
- TeenCentral takes extreme concern about keeping our writers anonymous for your safety. However, we can tell in general when a writer is from outside the US. In order to help you we have looked up some numbers and websites that WILL BE helpful to you and your sister where you are located. First, there is a 24 hour helpline in your country that you can call in order to report the abuse you are experiencing. Simply call 1098 any time of the day or night, any day of the year, in order to report your abuse. These people on the hotline are experts and will be able to help you. They are also connected to a website that allows you to report via a webform if you prefer. That website is as follows: Report a Case | CHILDLINE India Foundation.
- We suggest that you take pictures of the bruises and other injuries you have sustained from the abuse you are describing. This will make it easier for both of you to prove what’s happening to you. Lots of times adults will believe other adults before they believe kids. BUT if you have evidence like photographs with dates written down on paper next to the arm, leg, face, etc. it will show when the injuries took place. It will document how often it’s happening and how severe you are being hurt. Your sister and you can help each other do this and you can keep the information together in case you ever asked for it.
LATER ON WHEN YOU ARE READY
- You and your sister are under TREMENDOUS STRESS. What you are experiencing at home is NOT OKAY and it can cause both of you to be TRAUMATIZED.
- Coping with STRESS:
- There is much on this website to guide you through coping with stress. Allow me to suggest a few items that are foundational for learning these skills. First is BREATHING. When you are coping with stress many times we feel anxiety and do not realize it. Learning to notice the need to take a “deep breathing break” is a key skill. I suggest reading THIS ” WHAT’S NEW BLOG” on Deep Breathing in order to learn and practice this skill.
- Secondly, you have already shown us that you are a writer by writing your story into TeenCentral. Now, begin to use writing as a coping skill. Review THIS “WHAT’S NEW BLOG” on Journaling for Coping with Stress” in order to learn and practice this skill.
- All types of abuse during youth have an impact on your growth and development. However, that doesn’t mean that your doomed for life! I want to talk about two things that a person often has to deal with when they have been traumatized – ANXIETY and struggling to RELAX when they are under a lot of stress.
- We encourage you to learn more about anxiety and how to deal with it on the LEARN tab and then click over to the “ANXIETY” topic. This will help you.
- Also we encourage you to explore the entire WELLNESS tab under LEARN as well, but specifically to spend some time looking at the “RELAXATION” tab. Additionally, on the TOOLS tab check out the downloadable tool about using music to help you de-stress. There is a lot more there but start with music. I think you may find it helpful.
Most importantly, what’s happening to you is FUNDAMENTALLY WRONG. You and your sister are important and valuable to the world. You do not deserve to be hurt in this way. There are countless other ways to discipline children. Unfortunately, your parents probably learned this from their parents and perhaps, it’s all they know. That still DOES NOT MAKE IT RIGHT. Please keep seeking help for yourself. TeenCentral will always be here.