My First Heartbreak…

Everyone has their first heartbreak you know? But I feel like this hurts more than anything I’ve ever  experienced. I’m 15 and we were together for a year. We were in love with each other. He was my first everything first kiss, first real relationship, he took my virginity. I carved my name into his back. We were in love and he began to be apart of me.  Losing him would break me, and well, that’s what it’s doing now. Because you can give someone your everything and they can still walk away. He said he feels literally nothing for me. And he told me he’s talking to someone else and spent the night at her house actually. I can’t help but feel everything. It took everything in me to not hurt myself. I’ve been high like basically everyday just to try and get through. I don’t think I can find someone as good as him and the fact that he can, and call them better than me kills me. He was my everything and I mean nothing to him.

FIRST THINGS FIRST

• First I want to commend you for being so brave and reaching out for help. I know for some, that can be very difficult to do, but you found the strength to do it. Now lets look at how we can help.
• It has to be really difficult to share such a difficult experience about yourself with anyone. Even sharing your feelings here, with our Teen Central Community, must have taken some serious courage. So, thank you for coming to us. Never feel you have to be alone. As you may have seen on our page, there are many other kids like you who have similar struggles and this is a safe place to talk about them.
• If your mental health symptoms of depression, anxiety and self-injury ever become intense enough that you may become unsafe toward yourself, please stop immediately and consider one of these alternatives

National Suicide Hotline
Available 24/7 – In order to reach the National Suicide Hotline you DIAL or TEXT 988 – or CHAT at 988lifeline.org.

https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org

Crisis Textline
Available 24/7
Support to all individuals in crisis

Text “HOME” to 741741
www.crisistextline.org

• Other numbers may be helpful to your specific situation as well. They are located on our HELP PAGE. The reason we provide these numbers to you is because sometimes it is really helpful to talk on the phone or over chat where you are having a back-and-forth conversation rather than waiting for an answer.
• You can also go to your nearest emergency room or call your local authorities for help.
• You said in your story that you struggle with feeling deeply and strongly about others, I want to recognize how that may present challenges in your life and your relationships with others. The impact this has on your life can be very noticeable and I can see how hard you have tried to correct that.
• Something to think or journal about: What emotion is loudest right now, and where do you feel it physically in your body?  If this feeling could talk, what message is it trying to give you? Also – are there any safe adults in your life who you can talk to about your struggles? (They don’t have to be family members).

WORKING THROUGH THE ISSUES

Self-Injury: If hurting yourself is the way you are coping with all of this stress, ask yourself if there is another way – a safer way- to cope with these overwhelming feelings.  There are some ideas here right on TC and one tool you might be able to buy online:

• Journaling to cope
• Journal prompts if you need them

Depression:  Did you know you can talk to your pediatrician about your depression symptoms? He or she may be able to help you. In most scenarios medical professionals can be of assistance as well.  If you attend school, you may be able to receive services there. Reach out to a counselor and tell them about your situation. In the meantime, you can work on some of your issues with tools we have right here:

• About depression
• Using music
• Breathe

Hopelessness and loneliness: I know life can be quite difficult to navigate sometimes but DON’T GIVE UP! If you ever feel like you need someone to talk to or you feel like you want to seek more help, try talking to your parents or someone you trust (like a counselor, therapist, etc.) about ways that they might be able to support you.

Remember, there is always more beyond what we see.  We just have to be brave enough to endure the difficulties along the way. Continue to look for safe people in your family and friendships, or even your community.  Focus your efforts into creating relationships that support and build YOU, and as always, Teen Central will be here if you need us!