I’m a high school senior, a girl, and have always thought of myself as being straight. That said, part of me is curious to know what it would be like to be with another girl. One of my friends at school is a girl who’s very out about being gay. She recently told me she’d be up for a one-night stand if I really want to find out. Is it wrong of me to want to accept her offer to experiment? I know some people would find this weird and I’m sure my parents would freak if they ever found out.
Things You Can Do Right Now
- It seems like you have a really tough decision to make. Thank you for having the courage to share your story with the TeenCentral Community. Be proud of yourself for reaching out for help.
- It seems like you’re having mixed feelings about being with a girl and questioning your sexuality. This can be very scary and overwhelming. On TeenCentral under the “Learn” tab we have a section on “Sexuality”. Check it out it may give you some comfort and possibly answer some doubts and worries you may have. Keep in mind, these types of questions are actually very normal- many people question their sexuality at some point, or they express just feeling curious. You’re not alone in this.
- I know you stated that you think your parents would freak out, but have you tried talking to one of both of them, giving them the benefit of the doubt? Under the “Learn” tab we also have a section on “family” that may help communicate better with them if you decide you’re willing to try it.
- Have you considered making a pro’s and con’s list? Sometimes writing things out and seeing it in front of you may help. Under the “Tools” tab we have an activity called “Making A Hard Decision,” Keep in mind what you’re really deciding on. Is it telling someone, experimenting, sex itself, or something else? If you decide not to talk to your parents, is there another adult preferably in your life that can help talk you through this situation?
Where To Go From Here
- Consider using any of the following things to help you process your situation.
- Journaling – this is a great way to let your feelings out and organized your thoughts and feelings. Consider having a notebook where you can journal daily. It can be free writing or give yourself a question or subject each day, for example, “today am feeling…,” “one emotion I felt today and why…,” etc. This may be a great place to keep your pros and cons list, or just somewhere unbiased to get those worries you have out.
- Hobbies/Interest – are you involved in any sports or extracurricular activities? Sometimes getting energy out or distracting yourself for awhile gives you mind the chance to take a break for the constant worry and will allow you a clearer view into what answers you’re looking for.
- In the end, you are responsible for the decision that will directly impact you. If you’re not ready for the hard conversations, you may not be ready to experiment with those things you can’t talk about. That being said, whatever you decide, be proud of yourself for seeking guidance and taking the time to really think through your choices ahead of time.
We hope this helps. Here is a positive self-talk activity just in case you need a little positivity to start your day!
