I wanna come out as boyflux.
I am an 14-year old boy that identifies as boyflux. I actually am an born-female. I wanna say what I really am to my parents, but IDK how they’re going to afford It. I thought of saying then Im trans instead, and later explaining what boyflux is to them.
Also, I know that It is a very important decision if I start my transition, and I don’t wanna regret it later!
I really know what I am, but Im not sure about how everyone is going to talk about me when they hear about it…
What should I do?
- Thank you for trusting the Teen Central community with this very personal and important issue. You’re going through a tough time as you figure out how to let people know who you are, and we appreciate you reaching out to us for some help.
- Sometimes people in the LGBTQIA community don’t feel very accepted, which can often lead to feeling hopeless, lonely, or uncared for. It’s important that we tell you there is lots of support out there for you (besides us!). Please take the time to put these numbers and websites somewhere that you can easily find them if you ever need them:
Gay Lesbian Bisexual Transgender National Help Center
Monday-Friday 1pm to 9pm pacific time
Monday-Friday 4pm to 12am eastern time
Saturday 9am to 2pm pacific time
Saturday 12pm to 5pm eastern time
Support for LGBT youth
Youth Talkline: 1-800-246-PRIDE (7743)
Hotline staffed by volunteers who are all trans-identified and educated in the range of difficulties transgender people experience
U.S. (877) 565-8860
Canada (877) 330-6366
- The other thing to consider is do you have anyone in your life that you can trust to help you either figure out how to talk with your parents and/or be with you when you do talk with them? If it feels really difficult or scary to talk with your parents, is there anyone else that you could start the conversation with that wouldn’t feel as hard? The practice may help you figure out how you want to talk with your parents when you’re ready.
WHEN YOU’RE READY:
- Deciding to talk with someone about something personal like sexuality or gender is tough, no matter how accepting you think the other person is. During this time, make a plan to take care of yourself, on purpose, everyday. Figure out the things you like to do – music, art, dance, going out in nature, sports, video games, reading – whatever it is that helps you feel peaceful. Try to do that thing at least 10 minutes every day. You will feel the positive effects of taking care of yourself! Check out our WELLNESS section for more info and resources as well as TOOLS and WHAT’S NEW for all kinds of ideas.
- Be prepared for questions from your parents as they work through understanding this information you’re giving them. Consider sharing some of the information from this section in LEARN: TEEN CENTRAL l LGBTQ Youth as well as information from the websites we listed above. You’ve probably spent a lot of time already learning about what being boyflux or trans or other identities means – so be patient if they are trying to catch up.
- You may have some hard days ahead, so plan ahead by using a POSITIVE DAILY REMINDER. You can do this! Check out some of the stories from other people that have struggled with the same questions. You are not alone!!