Please I need help, I’m 15 I’m on probation right now and my mom uses that against me when we fight all the time. A couple of times it got really bad that it was a fist fight. I love my mom a lot but sometimes she can be mentally abusive to me she makes fun of me when I cry and she calls the cops on me when we fight and they end up always taking me away. While I’m in there she says she is gonna leave me there if I don’t changed and she said the next time I go to the hospital she is not gonna get me and every body is on her side they don’t see all the drinking she does or anything, I don’t wanna die but I don’t wanna be alive what do I do?
LINK TO SOME HELP:
- Thank you for writing in to TeenCentral.com and sharing your experience with our community. We hope you will find some useful resources here to help you through this stressful time.
- If you are feeling unsafe, or you feel so sad that you have no one you can turn to please reach out to the Suicide Prevention Lifeline. They are available 24 hours a day, you can contact them by calling 1-800-273-8255 or https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org. If you would rather text someone you can contact the crisis help line by texting “Hello” to 741-741. There is always someone just a text away. If you do not live in The United States and you are feeling suicidal you may want to try going to the nearest hospital. The doctors there would be able to help you and keep you safe.
- Is there anyone in your life that you feel safe talking to about this situation? Think about it, is there a parent, older sibling, neighbor, or another trusted adult you can discuss this with? Even consider being more open with your probation officer, they may not know your side of things unless you speak to them. Just being able to get these feelings out to someone in your life might feel like a weight lifted off your shoulders. Perhaps one of these people could also help you talk to your mother. It sounds like you love and respect her but need a little help with the communication of feelings and concerns between you both and sometimes that extra person can help. If you are not comfortable saying these things to her, consider also writing a letter to her. Sometimes we can get more information out in a letter that we would not be able to say to someone in person. TeenCentral will always be here to talk to you but sometimes a good old-fashioned face-to-face conversation is what you really need.
- From what you mentioned, you are on probation and have been in some physical altercations. We have learned from a company called Life Space Crisis Intervention Inc. that the only variable one can control in a crisis situation is our own actions and responses. It is normal when overwhelmed to become flooded with thoughts and feelings but we have a quick minute to decide how to act on those thoughts and feelings. Practicing mindfulness is like working out a muscle in your body…with practice it gets stronger and more powerful. Check out these TEDTalks on mindfulness TED Talks. You can also go to the WELLNESS SECTION of this website to learn more about mindfulness and relaxation.
- A crisis is simply something that overwhelms the mind/body’s ability to cope and it happens from time to time in everyone. Here are some ideas for coping with such stress: 12 Tips for Dealing With Trauma (verywellmind.com)
- Lastly, take ownership of your actions. Violence never solves problems, it in fact exacerbates them. Such powerful and influential people as Martin Luther King Jr and Gandhi have influenced the world without violence. “In spite of temporary victories, violence never brings permanent peace.”- MLK.