Messed Up Life
I am 18 years old, almost 19 years old, and my life is really messed up right now. I’m depressed and suicidal. My parents yell at me, belittle me, and pick on me. I end up feeling worthless and this has been happening for years. My mother has ‘borrowed’ money and I haven’t gotten any back. She promised me she would pay me back but now she’s saying money is not always promised. I have no money, apparently, in any of my accounts (Mom has access to them all). What do I do? I feel helpless and beside myself anymore.
- Having a life full of problems can make you feel hopeless and alone. You are strong for enduring insensitive comments from your parents and severe mental health issues even though nobody deserves this abuse.
- You can head to the Teen Central website and click the Help tab to call one of the hotlines if you need someone to talk to. You can speak to a trusted therapist, school counselor or religious leader if you’d like. Click the Stories tab to read other stories submitted by teens so you don’t feel so alone.
- Knowledge is power. You can click the Learn tab. Then click on Depression, Bullying and Suicide to better understand your issues.
- It’s morally wrong for parents to abuse their children. They’re bullying you just because they can. You can gain power over your own life by becoming more responsible. You may want to get a part-time or full-time job on the internet or in your area. Since you’re 18, you have the right to move out of your parents’ house. You can open your own accounts in your own name and/or change your passwords. Alternatively, try hiding the money somewhere else where your parents can’t find it. You have the right to live your own life and protect your own information and money. Consider learning about the law and hold it against your parents so they can’t control you. Abuse, harassment and stealing money are against the law.
- You can be positive by letting abuse make you a stronger person. Learn to love and respect your body, mind and spirit. Toxic people will only hold you back from living the life you truly deserve. Only have friends and family in your life who love you as yourself. You can try distancing yourself from your parents by focusing on work, hobbies and by practicing self-love so you can live life on your own terms. Learn to keep healthy boundaries by knowing your limits and making self-care a priority. The Tools tab on the Teen Central website has downloadable resources called 8 Signs of Healthy Relationships and 8 Signs of Unhealthy Relationships.
- Try reminding yourself to be positive by downloading the Positive Reminder and Positive Talk resources under the Tools tab on the Teen Central website. Repeat positive affirmations to yourself each day. Always having something to hope for can keep you from spiraling out of control and harming yourself. You can have hope by reading inspirational quotes or stories about real life heroes. Find something to make you laugh by reading comics or watching humorous movies.
- Since you can’t control your parents and make them stop bullying you, you can control yourself. You can use creativity as a healthy outlet to express your feelings. Try drawing, creative writing, painting, playing a musical instrument or listening to music.
- You can find ways to get away from your parents. Try heading to your local park, library or join a sports team or other group of people who have the same goals as you.
- Spirituality can give your life meaning and a sense of safety when times are tough. Prayer, meditation and yoga can help you calm down, focus and accept what you can’t change.
- You can take action in a positive way by volunteering. Helping to improve the lives of others can make you feel better about your negative circumstances. Volunteering can make your life more meaningful, give you a healthy outlet and help you find friends who think like you. Volunteermatch and other websites can help you find opportunities online or in your area. Some organizations to consider are animal shelters, soup kitchens, nursing homes or hospitals. Train to be a counselor, read books to children or use art therapy to help people with mental health issues or disabilities. You can also plant trees or join a community garden to help the environment. The opportunities to change the world are endless.
- No one has the right to steal your life from you. With hard work, strength and perseverance, you can overcome your situation to live a better life than you thought you could. Committing to have a positive mindset will help you gain the strength you need to gain control of your own life.
- What are some things you can learn from your problems?
- In what ways can having a positive mindset help you now and in the future?
- In what ways can being yourself make your life worth living?
- How can you make sure you never become a bully like your parents?
- How could your life be different if you got rid of toxic relationships and only had healthy ones?