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Really Really Sad Today

By June 24, 2020No Comments

*Disclaimer: This post contains a combination of English and Filipino text. We have included both the original text and a translation to the best of our ability.

Hi everyone! I’m really really sad today because of my family (tita and my cousin both girls) because I’ve been bullied so many years by these two saying that I’m a bakla kasi nga hindi ako tanggap ng dad ko kasi we’re born again christian. I want to die right now because of that actually we had a fight lately and misunderstanding sya so eto po yung kwento kanina po kasi yung dad ko bigla syang nag sabi sakin na “Nag aahit kba ng kilay mo gab? Tas sabi ko hindi dad bakit na naman (although alam ng dad ko na minsan nag aahit ako ng kilay and i don’t know why he reacts like that so fast forward tinanong ko sya nun sabi nya may nagsabi sa kanya and sabi sino nagsabi sabay di na nya ko sinagot so i posted on my fb account about that kasi nga kilay na lang ang dami pang sinasabi. And hindi naman kabastosan yung post ko sabi ko lang don di nyo po ikauunlad yung pagpansin kung anong meron sa ibang tao kesyo nag ahit sya ng kilay or nag dagdag sya ng kilay then tawa marami. Don po sa point na yon i’m really sorry to the people i insulted na kahit di ko naman intensyon insultihin sila and first of all po hindi naman po pang iinsulto yung mga sinabi ko don. Tapos po nung kumakain na kame ng fam ko sabi ko sino ba nagsabi sayo dad about sa kilay sipain ko mukha nya eh tas sabay binatukan nya ko tita mo yon ano tadjakan mopa tas sabay sabi ako ng bat ang dami nilang pinapansin sakin bat hindi nila pansinin sarili nila and I’m so sad when i heard that na tita ko at pinsan ko ang nag open up about sa kilay ko and sa ate ko nila sinabi. And then nag comment na yung pinsan ko na anak about sakin then ako pa rin nag sorry sa kanila and nung nakausap kona tita ko puro sya baklang walang respeto tas pinaapaintindi ko sa kanya kung ano ba ang nangyare tas sabi nya di nya daw papakinggan sa mga dahilan ko so ako nakinig na lang po ako and say sorry. Sobrang na huhurt po ako kahit mga kaibigan ko nagagalit sakin kasi diko daw po kayang ipagtanggol sarili ko. I’m in a depression right now because kahit family ko (ate and magulang ko) hindi nila ako pinagtanggol because yung mga taong nangbubully sakin ay maraming natulong sa family ko and maraming pera 😭😭😭😭😭😭

Text Translation:

Hi everyone! I’m really really sad today because of my family (aunt and my cousin both girls) because I’ve been bullied so many years by these two saying that I’m a gay because my dad doesn’t accept me because we’re born again christian. I want to die right now because of that we actually had a fight lately and misunderstanding her so here is the story of her earlier because my dad suddenly said to me “Why are you bruising your eyes?” again (although my dad knows that sometimes I shave my eyebrows and I don’t know why he reacts like that so fast forward I asked him he said he told him and said who said once he didn’t answer so i posted on my fb account about that because the bruise is just too much to say, and it’s not a bad word for my post saying i just don & # 39; t improve it by noticing what other people have but shave their eyebrows or extra he brushes then laughs a lot .. Don at this point i’m really sorry to the people i insulted that even though i didn’t intend to tell them and first of all i don’t even insult those i said no. I’m eating my family’s food I say who told you dad bout in the brow I kick her face eh bag once she punctuate it you know what tjakan mopa tas once I say bat they pay attention to me and they don’t notice themselves and I’m so sad when i heard that i was aunt and my cousin opened up about my brow and to my sister they said. And then commenting on my cousin’s son about me and then I still apologize to them and when he talked to my aunt that he was just kidding no respect I asked him what he was saying he didn’t listen to those cause I just listened to me and say sorry. It’s just that I hate it even though my friends are angry because I just can’t defend myself. I’m in a depression right now because even my family (my parents and my parents) didn’t defend me because those who helped me out have helped my family a lot of money 😭😭😭😭😭😭

HELP YOURSELF

  • I can tell that this misunderstanding is really affecting you, you came to the right place. Teen Central is ready to help you find the resources and support you need right now!
  • If you are ever considering harming yourself or others, there are international resources for you that may help you to navigate some of the intense feelings you’re experiencing. For example, the Crisis Textline number (741741) can be used at any time by texting “Hello,” or the Philippines Suicide Hotline can be found at (02) 8969191. These numbers are here for you whenever you need them! Even if you don’t think you are feeling suicidal, it is better to reach out to talk to someone than to try to tackle this alone.
  • If you are struggling with your sexuality, we may be able to offer help through resources and information right here on this site. If you click the Learn tab, there is a whole page on sexuality. This includes information on how to talk to your family, how to come out if you decide you want to, as well as some really helpful videos on gender identity. It can be a complicated topic to explore on your own, so we hope you can find something useful here!

CONSIDER THIS

  • From what I can see, you are very focused on keeping positive relationships with your many family members. It can be exhausting to put so much effort into making everyone else in our life happy, so much so that we often neglect ourselves and our own needs. What are you able to do to take care of your physical, mental, and emotional well-being? There are so many emotions in just this story, and all of those emotions need a place to go in order for your depression and anger to be safely managed.
  • When it comes to sexuality, sometimes family members are the most difficult to open up to. It may be important for you to find a support system in your community or school. Once you’ve read through the Sexuality tab listed above, would you consider joining an advocacy group in your local area? You may be able to find a mentor, a peer, or a group focused on supporting each other. If you aren’t ready for in-person conversation, you could try the International Lesbian Gay Bisexual Trans and Intersex Association (https://ilga.org/) for more resources and online communities that you can connect to.
  • Have you ever thought about arts- or mindfulness-based self-care practices? There is a new blog post on Art as a coping skill for stress, or a worksheet on Sun Salutations. These practices can be as simple or as complicated as you need them to be, and may help you to focus on the good and powerful within yourself, as opposed to the negativity that surrounds you. It’s amazing how refreshed you can feel after engaging in a creative process!